i'm wide awake, it's morning

- i don't need all these.
- what, exactly?
- this. another person to make me whole. i am whole.
- you mean you don't need love?
- exactly. i don't need that kind of love.
- are you ok?
- yes. that's what i'm trying to say. that i'm ok. that i'm ok like this.
- alone?
- no. don't say that word, it gives me chills. i'm not alone. i have you. and all the others.
- who?
- well, you know... friends.
- yeah, but they all have someone. they have love.
- and i have them.
- are you sure you're ok?
- i don't know. i guess i could use some love, too.
- are you saying you need someone to make you whole?
- i think so, but this scares me. i want my friends and my music and writing to be enough. i don't want to wish for someone else, you know...
- that's never enough. you'll always wish for something more.
- i don't want this. i want to be my own soulmate. everything would be much easier this way.
- what would be easier?
- this. life. i would spend it pleasing myself, instead of pleasing someone else. doing what i love, instead of wasting it, searching for that one of a kind puzzle piece that fits perfectly next to my heart. something i may never even find...
- but that's what us, humans, were cursed to do. to desire. not to be able to live without.
- i wish that puzzle piece was already inside of me, was something i already have. i wish it was myself, because i'm the only person who will always be with me. and that's sad.
- you're not ok, are you?
- it's already morning, again, and i don't want to keep waking up with a cold body, in an empty bed. but admiting i need someone else freaks me out.

---

asta nu e nimic mai mult decat constiinta mea, incercand sa ma convinga ca am nevoie de ceva mai mult. de cineva. dar sunt bine, mi-e bine asa. :)

voi fi mereu în amintirea ta

voi pleca fără să clipesc,
lăsând în urmă doar
pălăria mea pe o bancă rece,
parfumul meu în aerul cald de vară,
zâmbetul meu vesel în mintea ta,
sărutul meu încrustat pe buzele tale,
atingerea mea uşoară pe braţul tău
şi un gol în inima ta.

iar când steaua aceea strălucitoare
pe care o priveşti în fiecare noapte
va cădea,
tu iţi vei dori ca eu să fiu
lângă tine.
şi tot ce vei putea avea va fi
o amintire uitată într-o ramă,
pe un colţ de etajeră.

le voi păstra cu mine

mi-am împachetat inima
între hainele groase de iarnă,
pentru a mă asigura
că nu se va rupe când voi pleca.

mi-am legat ambiţiile
cu o sfoară, le-am umplut cu heliu
şi le-am dat drumul în aer,
astfel încât să ajungă cât mai sus.

mi-am adunat toate amintirile
între rame vechi şi prăfuite,
pentru a mă asigura
că nici una nu se va pierde în timp.

mi-am pus toate visele
într-o cutie subţire de carton
pe care am scris "fragil",
astfel încât nici unul să nu fie spulberat.

gata, am terminat.
acum sunt pregătită să plec.
dar nu voi fi niciodată pregătită
să las totul în urmă...

yeah, survey again.

BASIC INFO

Full Name: madalina andreea.
Nickname: mada / madii / star girl.
Date of birth: 26 decembrie 1991.
Place of birth: oradea.
Current location: oradea (soon, cluj).
Eye colour: hazel.
Hair colour: red (natural color: black).
Are you right or left handed?: right.
Do you have any siblings?: one step sister.
Do you live with your parents?: only my mom, for another 2 months.


WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE...

Movie?: fight club.
TV show?: one tree hill.
Singer/Band?: mcfly.
Song?: mcfly - smile.
Actor/Actress?: chad michael murray / sophia bush.
Food?: lasagna, pizza, french fries.
Number?: 26, 21, 4, 5.
Cartoon character?: dale (chip & dale).
Color?: blue.
Sport?: soccer.
Quote?: every song has an end, but that's no reason not to enjoy the music.
Memory?: b'estfest 2010, primul meci pe ghencea.
Dream?: to become a writer, to travel the world.
Place to relax?: my bed.
Hero?: my best friend.
Book?: the millenium trilogy, the twilight saga.
Drink?: nestea, cuba libre, vodka apple.


WOULD YOU PREFER...

Music or TV?: music.
Guys or girls?: guys.
Green or blue?: blue.
Pink or purple?: purple.
Summer or winter?: summer.
Night or day?: night.
Dopey or funny?: funny.
Diamond or pearl?: diamond.
Sunset or sunrise?: sunset.
Funny or scary movies?: funny movies.
On the phone or in person?: in person.
Hugs or kisses?: hugs.
Rich or famous?: famous.
McDonalds or KFC?: kfc.
Single or group dates?: single dates.
Chocolate or vanilla?: vanilla.
Cappuccino or coffee?: cappuccino.


RELATIONSHIPS

Who is the nicest person you know?: bia.
Who is the funniest person you know?: pantis.
Who is the loudest person you know?: ralu.
Who is the weirdest person you know?: zambi.
Who is the hottest person you know?: maro.
Who are the four people you are most open with?: razvi, ali, darius, ralu.
Are you/have you ever been in love?: have been.
If so, what was/is so special about them?: the way they treated me.
Do you think it is right to flirt if you have a bf/gf?: no.
How far would you go on a first date?: not too far.
Where would you want to go on your honeymoon?: on a remote island.
Describe the type of person you would want to spend the rest of your life with: compassionate, funny, cute, tall, smart, loving, caring, i don't know.
When was the last time you talked to the person you like?: this morning.
What are the qualities you find most attractive in the opposite sex?: cuteness, green eyes, messy hair, nice smile.


MUSIC

What is the song you are listening to right now?: melanie fiona - monday morning.
What is the next CD you are going to get?: the new album from mcfly.
Which song reflects you the most?: gavin degraw - i don't wanna be
If you were on Australian Idol, which song would you pick to sing and why?: everly - flying machine; just because i like singing it.


HAVE YOU EVER...

Met Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny?: no.
Gone skinny dipping?: no.
Danced in a public place?: yes.
Smiled for no reason?: yes.
Laughed so hard you cried and/or peed your pants?: yes.
Written a song?: yes.
Made out in a movie theatre?: yes.
Lied when someone asked you "Do I look ok in this?": yes.
Lied to make someone happy?: yes.
Threatened someone?: yes.
Been threatened by someone?: yes.


FINISH THE LINE

I am...: sociable.
My heart is...: in a lot of different places.
If I were a...: bird, i'd be truly happy.
I wish...: i was in dubrovnik right now.
So many people don't know that...: i smile, but that doesn't mean everything's fine.
If I could be anyone I would be...: sophia bush.


IF YOU HAD SUPERPOWERS WOULD YOU RATHER...

Control weather or read minds?: read minds.
Be good or evil?: evil.
Be invisible or have super speed?: be invisible.
Have super strength or flight?: flight.